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Puns

12 jokes

A pun works by making one word do two jobs at once. The listener hears the first meaning, commits to it, and then the punchline swaps in the second. That half-second of recalculation is where the laugh comes from — which is also why a pun explained is a pun ruined.

This collection leans on wordplay that survives being read rather than heard, so it works just as well in a text message as it does out loud. Mix in a few from the dad jokes section if you want an audience that is groaning by dessert.

🇬🇧 EN#p1

I used to be a banker,

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🇬🇧 EN#p2

Time flies like an arrow.

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🇬🇧 EN#p3

I'm on a seafood diet.

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🇩🇰 DA#p4

Jeg plejede at spille klaver på øret,

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🇩🇰 DA#p5

Bageren blev fyret

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🇬🇧 EN#p6

I wasn't originally going to get a brain transplant,

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🇬🇧 EN#p7

The shovel was a groundbreaking invention.

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🇬🇧 EN#p8

I'm reading a book on the history of glue.

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🇬🇧 EN#p9

The past, present, and future walked into a bar.

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🇬🇧 EN#p10

I lost my job at the calendar factory.

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🇩🇰 DA#p11

Jeg var ked af det, da min kaffemaskine gik i stykker.

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🇩🇰 DA#p12

Elektrikere er altid i lyst humør.

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Frequently asked questions

What is the difference between a pun and a dad joke?
Every dad joke contains a pun, but not every pun is a dad joke. Puns can be clever, dark or adult; dad jokes are deliberately clean and deliberately obvious.
Do puns translate between English and Danish?
Almost never. A pun depends on how one specific language happens to spell or pronounce a word, so we keep the Danish and English collections separate rather than translating them badly.